The Lord is righteous in all His ways & kind in all His works.

“[The Lord is faithful in all His words and kind in all His works.] The Lord upholds all who are falling and raises up all who are bowed down. The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food in due season. You open your hand; You satisfy the desire of every living thing. The Lord is righteous in all His ways and kind in all His works.” Psalm 145:13-17

Unfortunately today I am writing with some sad news. On Thursday, I got a phone call from the regional headquarters of Cru and they decided going to Italy for this year would not be the best option for me. I know different variables went into this decision, none that I am truly comfortable writing here on the internet, but if you want to know more, I would be more than happy to share personally. I am sure it is just as much of a surprise to all my faithful friends and family as it is to me. However, I can say with confidence that I trust their decision is from the Lord and this is His way of clearly leading me in a different direction for this season of my life. I am thankful for that.

To describe how I am feeling is a bit difficult, because I am all over the place. Much of me is very heartbroken over the loss of something I had put all my hope into, made plans around, and worked hard for 3+ months for, and not to mention the driving force behind the work: seeing God move in Italy. Some of me is angry at times, wondering why it had to be now, right before everything was supposed to be finished, wondering what I could have done better. A bit of me feels like a failure, like I didn’t do enough, like I do not measure up, like you need to be a certain kind of person or have certain talents to be in full-time ministry overseas, and I just don’t have them. A lot of me is wondering, “What the heck am I going to do now?” And the most dramatic part of me is saying, “Well, I guess that is it for Italy and I. It’s just not ever going to happen.”

Then I remember who I am in Him and the promise of Psalm 145:17: “The Lord is righteous in all His ways and kind in all His works.” This is not beyond God’s kindness or sovereignty. Was it a pretty big blow to me? Most assuredly. Was I expecting it? Definitely not. But that doesn’t negate His kindness in this. He has always been, is, and forever will be faithful to us. While I can’t see the full outcome right now of His kindness in keeping me where I am, He can be trusted to abide with me and provide me with all comfort and hope that He is doing a good thing in me.

A couple weeks ago I read some tweets from Louie Giglio that really reminded me of God’s grace in my life, just how beyond my understanding it is, and how it covers me even now

Grace: Jesus is more than enough in every situation before you even realize how insufficient your abilities/resources are.
Grace: seeing in each moment that Jesus is willing to serve us/save us long before we make any grand promises to Him.
Grace: realizing in every circumstance Jesus is already in motion/working before we know what the problems and needs are.
Grace: realizing in every situation Jesus is already there long before you arrive.

I am seeing the truth of 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 in a different light: “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” I am fully convinced His grace is what decided this for me, and is providing the strength to move forward. Being in the center of His will is what I want, regardless.

I am sure there is much more to be blogged about that I can’t wrap my head around for now, but I want to thank every single person who has been with me on this faith-stretching journey. You, my friends and family, have prayed for me, encouraged me, donated your time, energy, and resources to make this happen, and I could not be more grateful for you. Nothing in this process was in vain, for I believe God worked in so many ways (some that are unknown to me), and He is still enthroned and glorified; that is what it is all about. He will continue to do astounding things in Bologna, Tampa, and all over this earth, and I am grateful to be part of it no matter what. Soli Deo Gloria.

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13 thoughts on “The Lord is righteous in all His ways & kind in all His works.

  1. I can only try to imagine your dissapointment. But place you faith in Him, there is a reason. Keep you heart, mind and passion strong. Your misson in life will be shared when He feels it is right. This could be a test of your faith. The answer may not come as quick as you wish, but you will discover in time what our God has for you. In meeting you, When we met, I felt His presence, His love in you. Know that one day maybe in the form of a dream He will reveal your path, your personal mission.
    He test our faith, we can not always get what we want, but when we accept our situation, He will bless you when you don not expect it.
    Live each day of your life keeping your faith in God, remembering His love and peace he wishes for you!

    • Thank you for your kind words, Mr. Gonzmart. I agree wholeheartedly and I know this is all part of God’s plan for me to draw me closer to Him. I am feeling more grateful for the way things have worked out each day.

  2. Dear Skylar I am sorry that this did not work out for you at this time. I do believe that God has great plans for you and he will show you in his time. I know that you are a great witness wherever you are. Love you and am proud to call you family. I know you will discover his next plan for you.
    Margie B

  3. I hesitated to push the “like” button, thinking why should I like somethings that is a disappointment for you. But I do like this post, not because of the news, but because even through this disappointing news for you, I see Him all over you. Your faith in Him even though you don’t understand His ways is clearly evident! And that, my dear (st..)daughter is like the faith of Abraham, Noah, Enoch, Able. The stuff Hebrews 11 talks about. The kind of faith that is pleasing to God. You may not be witnessing for Him in Italy in the near future, but you are witnessing for Him here and now. You are doing a brilliant job of it too! Love you! Todd

    • Thank you, Todd. God is teaching me through this that it is more about worshipping and knowing Him more than it is about what I do for Him. (Go to Italy, stay here, whatever) I am so grateful for having family like you who understands and supports me no matter what. (And not to mention who lets me move back home when things get a little crazy :]) I love you too!

  4. My sweet Buggy, I know it is hard to understand His ways but one day you will look back to this time and praise His decision. You will understand that He had a different path for you. You will be thoroughly blessed to overflowing by His awesome gift of abundance He wants for you. This seeming disappointment is really just a change of direction for you. Remember Jeramiah 29:11 when you feel less or mad or any of the things that plague you. He knows the plans He has for you. They are good! Love you so much, but He loves you more. 🙂

    • My sweet Mommy! You are so right, and this was HIS plan all along, even if I was taken aback, so I am taking comfort in that. Thank you for your support the whole way. You are the best and I love you so much!!!

  5. My sweet granddaughter, I am truly sorry for you. I know how hard you have worked and prayed for this to happen. There is nothing quite like disappointment, and I can tell you I have been there. I love you so very much and I know you will find your light and follow it to a brighter future. The Lord has big plans for you, I am sure.

  6. Pingback: A single phone call. « New Equus – A New Creation

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